A Baby Changes Everything

It's been a while...too long of a while since I last made a confession. Does that mean this blog update will be filled with confessions? Quite possibly but maybe not.

I guess let me get you caught up since my last update. I've still be able to avoid pop...really don't have a desire to drink it anymore, occasionally have a craving for it.

I'm right around the same weight as my last update.

I struggle to stay motivated in a busy life.

First confession...a baby changes everything.  With my wife having preterm labor (several different times), going back and forth to the hospital, and then having the baby when it was suppose to come (praise God for that) you can image the loops that had thrown in nutrition and doing workouts. My family is more important so during that time I just got to the gym when I could and would try to eat what I could given the circumstance.

So now a month later...I have two boys under the age of 2.  An 18 month old full of energy, and a 1 month old, that while he sleep a lot, still demands a lot of time and attention.

For the past two weeks I've tried to again put more emphasis back on getting to the gym and eating how I'm suppose to. Second confession....I still feel guilty about being away from my family to be at the gym. Granted I always try to go at a more convenient time, like when they are napping, but I switched my routine up again and my workouts are longer, meaning I'm away longer.  What am I missing while I'm away?

Bonding time. Smiles, giggles, and belly laughs. Burps. Dirty diapers. Snuggles. Stories. But it has become more real and apparent that I need to be working out to stay healthy.  In the long run, I'm trying to make it so I can be around longer for my family, to give them more time with me. And when I am home I have to cherish every moment and make it all it can be with them. I want to look good for my wife.  I want to demonstrate healthy habits for my kids, I want them to know that whatever amount of time God grants me with them is so valuable to me.  I want them to know that I love them.

Skinny guy is still skinny

Two weeks into the new workout routine/eating plan and it seems to be going great.  While I haven't put on much more weight yet I am seeing changes! Mainly, right now a way improved definition. Skinny guy is still skinny but with some very visible and growing muscle groups.

With this new workout routine I'm in the gym four times a week and I'm loving the workouts because there is a lot of variation, and I finish sweating so I know I am working hard.  Eating plan has been going pretty good, it changes slightly from week to week based on specific measurements.  I struggle the most with getting the amount of protein intake I need.

I'm redoing week two of the plan because I was only able to do half it on the first attempt.  We took a little family trip to Chicago at the end of the week and while they did have a workout room where we stayed, I didn't make use of it, instead I spent time with my family.

Speaking of family...the new little one will be be here 2 months or less...ahhhh! It's excited but at the same time a little nerve racking at the same time...turning into a family of four!

Progress, Plans & Pictures

It's been about a month, I apologize for that, but let me bring you up to speed on the whole confessions of a skinny guy recently.

1. This is not a confession.  This is an achievement! At the beginning of the year I have said no more pop (or soda if you live anywhere else), I have stuck true to this goal and have not had any pop since the beginning of the year.  I really don't crave it anymore either.  I am still tempted to drink it.  It's especially hard if there is a soda fountain nearby and I'm all by myself.  But every time I'm able to overcome the temptation.

2. Confession- I've been struggling with the guilt of being in the gym approximately 4 times a week. This is probably one of the hardest things that I've been dealing with.  Let me tell you why and where this guilt is steming from.  My wife works nights, I stay at home with our 1 year old son, and I work part time. Hence, I'm a busy guy and there is little time when we are together as a family.  But when we are together, it's the easiest time for me to ask my wife to watch our son so I can go to gym. When she is not available and I'm not working, I have to find someone to watch him or put him in the gym child care.  I always feel guilty for not spending more time with them and feel like I'm being selfish saying I need to go workout and have this time for just me.

I have truly found that my workout time is when I can best clear my head and not have to think about other stuff, or I find it a really good place to get off some stress. But to take away from family time, I don't know, I just have been struggling with that as of lately.  I know its good for me to have some time to myself, but is it too much time, and what about the relationship I could be building on with others.  In the end I usually come down to the conclusion that because of my family history, being in the gym is only going to allow me to have more time with them in the future, God willing, but then I question if that is that a valid excuse.

3.  Confession- Around the middle of February I started a new workout routine and eating plan.  Workout routine wasn't too bad but the nutritional aspect of the plan was super confusing. I just wasn't getting it and I wasn't able to figure out when I needed to switch between the two eating plans.  So I stopped. Praise the Lord. I've gone back to the program that I saw the most progress with that I started about a year and half ago.  This program has three different categories, I've just switched categories- its a different routine and different nutrition but its tracked the same way as before so its much easier.

The more I do this the more I realize that half of this is about working out and half of it is about nutrition and eating.  Without focusing on both I'm not going to see the results I'm looking for. I can do one without the other but I won't get a maximum return for my effort. It's like a car and fuel, you can have one without the other but if you want to get anywhere you need them both together.

4. Confession- I sometimes take pictures and video while I work out so I can look at my form and try to improve it (especially if a mirror is not available) and sometimes they turn out really cool and other times not. (I hope I'm not the only one that does this.) Here are some of the more cool ones!

Back to my PRIME!

Facing an extreme amount of temptation this past week to have just a little drink of pop. (At the start of the year I set a goal to not drink pop for a year and then see where that takes me from there). There were a few times where oh it would have been so easy to just get a little sip in.  But silly enough, the thing that makes me stop is how far I've already come with my goal so far.  I've made it two months...I can't ruin that with just a little sip of pop...the knowing guilt and frustration of just having a little drink beat out the temptations this time around.  I'm hoping that determination can keeping winning!

But what I am even more excited about is that this past week, I went an entire week in the gym without experiencing any back pain and I'm almost back up to the lifting weight that I left off at when I got injured in the first place. This has got me super excited with a lot of motivation to keep at it. I'm still trying to figure out the new eating plan along with the workout plan.  I think I'm getting it, but I believe I'll really get this nailed down in a week or two.  I'm seeing some results already, so I'm moving in the right track.  I'll explain the system more when I've got it worked out better.

But for now, I'm happy to back in the gym WITH NO BACK PAIN!

A Big Weakling

It's been 25 days since I hurt myself.....and I'm finally being able to start doing some upper-body workouts at the gym.  I still can't lift nearly the weight that I'm used to because of two things: 1-After not being able to lift for 25 days I'm weak and 2- If I go too heavy I start to feel it again in my back.  I'm hoping to get back up to weight quickly. It's kind of brought me back to the feeling of being in the gym when I first started lifting weights...skinny guy lifting little weights, except I'm more muscular now but lifting little weights. Self esteem killer right there.  Stay positive......keep you head up......keep your head up.

No Lifting...Now What?

The goal of this blog was to be real and raw with you...so here you go. I'm beyond frustrated right now.  The gym is a place I love to be.  It's the place where I can be away and process through all the thoughts in my head; put my headphones in and tune out everything else. It's where I go to help de-stress.  I've been going at it for so long now, its part of me. Weightlifting or doing cardio is my activity.

With my recent back injury I can't be lifting in the gym, until I heal.  I went to the doctor on Friday because the pain was not going away with pain meds and it was coming around to the front, so I was also tender and sore just under my pec muscle. The doctor did not believe I had broken a rib based upon my recollection of the injury or the symptoms I experienced afterward. She instead believes I tore, pulled, did some kind of injury to a major back muscle when I fell and that I have been experience muscle tightness and severe muscle spasms since.  What happens now...the same thing as if I would have broken a rib, let it heal on its own. Keep taking pain meds and she prescribed a muscle relaxer for me which has really been helping. But if I move just the right way I can feel that muscle go into a spasm and it hurts. The worst is when I sneeze- that brings about an intense amount of pain which last a few minutes in which I can not move or barely breathe.

(Experiencing pain in the Infraspinatus, Teres Minor, and Teres Major region)

So obviously I can't do any kind of lifting in the gym that uses that back muscle- if you have ever done any kind of lifting you know that you use your back muscles in a lot of lifts even if it's being used as a secondary muscle or to help stabilize your core.  That means a huge block to my training. So frustrated and angry.  But to be able to lift again I have to let it heal completely- I'm going to have to be patient. I think I may venture to the gym sometimes this week and see if I can find something that I can do where my back it completely stable  and I'm not using any of those muscles...most likely will mean that I'm doing a lot of leg stuff. Ahhh, just so disappointing.

Confession #5...Fractured Rib??

So just when I get rolling good, I do something stupid and have now possibly fractured a rib.  I was playing broomball (similar to hockey, expect you wear shoes on the ice instead of skates and hit a ball around with brooms or things that resemble brooms)

with some of the high school youth on their winter retreat this past weekend. I took a pretty nasty fall right on my left arm and back. It knocked the wind right out of me and I needed a few seconds to get back up (at least it wasn't my head).  I knew the fall was hard, but in that moment and for a few hours after I think my adrenaline was pumping high so I didn't really feel too much pain...until now. It hurts to move, lift anything, change positions, put on a coat, take a deep breath, cough, and sneezing is the worst.  For a fractured rib to heal you just need to give it time, sometimes a lot of time for it to heal on its own.  And this is all happening right in the middle of my training.  This is a huge obstacle that I'm not sure how to overcome.  I know for a fact I can't lift near what I was lifting last week. However, maybe this does come at somewhat of a good time as I was researching and planning to change up my workout routine.  I guess I'll just have to take it slow, one day at a time, and see how things go.  

In regards to the pop...I'm happy to report that I have still stayed true to that goal.  The withdrawals are gone.  Every once and a while I'll get a pretty intense craving, but I have been able to not succumb to the desire!